When Robert Hoge was born in Australia over five decades ago, he didn’t look like other newborns — and that’s exactly what makes his journey so powerful.
He entered the world with a massive tumor on his face and severely deformed legs, which doctors had no choice but to amputate. His appearance was so unexpected that his own mother, overwhelmed and heartbroken, initially couldn’t bear to look at him. She even asked the doctors to take him away.
Robert’s mother struggled deeply to accept her son’s condition — and she never hid how hard it was. Her honesty was raw, real, and at times painful. But this isn’t a story about rejection. It’s a story about transformation.
She is not the villain of this story. Far from it.
What unfolds is a deeply human tale of love, resilience, and redemption. And when you meet the man Robert grew up to be — confident, humorous, and wise — you’ll understand how both he and his mother helped each other grow in ways no one could have imagined.
Fifty-one years ago in Brisbane, a mother of four gave birth to her fifth child — a boy who would change her family forever.
Unlike her previous children, baby Robert was born with a large tumor between his eyes and severely deformed limbs. His appearance was shocking, even to the doctors. And for his parents, the moment was heartbreaking.
Overwhelmed with grief and confusion, they couldn’t bring themselves to look at their newborn son during his first week of life. His mother, devastated by the unexpected reality, couldn’t take him home. In her despair, she even confessed a painful thought — wishing he might not survive.
When her sister saw the baby for the first time, her reaction was blunt and cruel: “He’s so ugly.”
But Robert’s story didn’t end there.
With time, reflection, and immense courage, Robert’s mother came to see beyond the shock. Her heart began to change. Slowly but surely, she found the strength to accept her son — not despite his differences, but because of the love she realized he deserved.
The family gathered for a heartfelt meeting. In a powerful moment of unity, all four of Robert’s siblings voiced their desire to bring him home. They wanted him to be part of their lives — part of their family.
That decision marked the beginning of an extraordinary journey. One of acceptance. One of love. One that would inspire thousands.
At first glance, it might be easy to judge Robert Hoge’s mother for her reaction. But the truth is more complicated — and deeply human.
She was overwhelmed by fear. Not just fear of raising a child with complex medical needs, but fear of the world’s cruelty — of how others might treat her son, and how it might affect their entire family. She worried about bullying, ridicule, and the unknown path ahead.
But here’s what makes this story extraordinary: she changed. She found the strength to face those fears, and she chose love.
And Robert, wise beyond his years, never held her initial hesitation against her. He understood her pain. He accepted her journey. And in the end, that’s what mattered most.
With his place in the family secure and surrounded by love, Robert underwent the first of many surgeries.
Surgeons carefully removed parts of the tumor from his face and used cartilage from his toes to craft a new nose — a remarkable procedure that gave Robert both function and confidence. Unfortunately, his legs were so severely deformed that they had to be amputated. He was fitted with prosthetic legs, and from there, he began learning how to move through the world in his own way.
Through every step, Robert had what many people never do — a family that chose to stand by him when it mattered most.
In September 2016, Robert Hoge shared a deeply personal insight during an interview with NPR — a reflection that revealed the remarkable honesty and healing at the heart of his relationship with his mother.
As a child, Robert came to understand his mother’s fears and struggles not through whispered conversations or family secrets, but through something beautifully simple: her diary.
“One of the doctors had suggested my mother keep a diary,” Robert recalled. “And she did — a lovely blue diary, written in beautiful handwriting. It was never hidden from me.”
The diary became a quiet but powerful presence in their home. Sometimes it would rest on the couch beside her, other times on her bedside table. And when curiosity stirred in young Robert, he would ask, “Mum, can you read me a bit from your book?”
She always did.
In those moments, Robert heard his mother’s truth — her doubts, her grief, her fear — but also her gradual transformation. She didn’t sugarcoat her early feelings about his birth or his appearance. She didn’t pretend her journey had been easy.
“And I think I had a few times where I was a bit concerned and a bit worried and couldn’t quite understand,” Robert admitted. “But I think then it just clicked one day — it was like a movie that has some sad parts in the middle but has a happy ending.”
By the time Robert read those words, he already knew the ending. His parents had chosen love. They had brought him home. They had embraced him — fully, honestly, and forever.
That diary wasn’t just a record of a mother’s pain. It was a testament to her courage. And to the deep bond that would grow between her and the son she once feared she couldn’t love.
Today, Robert speaks of his mother and family with nothing but love and gratitude.
“Everyone has been wonderful, loving, and caring,” he says simply, reflecting the deep bond that has grown over the years.
By the time he was 30, Robert had started his own family. He and his wife, Kate, are proud parents to two daughters.
They live in Wynnum, a picturesque suburb along the shores of Moreton Bay in Brisbane, Australia — a place filled with natural beauty and tranquility.
Robert often reflects on the lessons he’s learned from his own parents, drawing on their strength and resilience as he raises his children.
Robert Hoge has built a remarkable career, first as a successful journalist and now as a civil servant, motivational speaker, and author.
Known for his sharp wit, genuine honesty, and contagious humor, Robert inspires audiences around the world with his story and insights.
He’s not afraid to lighten the mood, either. On his Facebook page, he once shared a playful post:
“I promised some more author photos and I think we’re all in need of some levity at the end of this week, right?
This is the photo I’d use if there was an online author dating site (and, you know, I was dating).”
Three years ago, Robert released his memoir, “Ugly”, a candid and powerful reflection on identity, acceptance, and resilience — a book that has touched countless readers.
“One reviewer described Robert’s story as ‘a gripping tale of an innocent boy who grew up believing he was normal, only to slowly realize he was not—in a society obsessed with appearance. Yet, through resilience and courage, he blossomed into a man who not only accepts himself but takes pride in who he is, even when others shrink away at his mere presence.’”
Despite numerous offers for further surgeries to “improve” his appearance, Robert has chosen to embrace himself fully — just as he is.
His message is clear and powerful: true strength comes from self-acceptance. And that’s a lesson we can all carry with us.
Please share Robert’s incredible story to help others learn to accept who they are!
